I was reading in my journal the other day, imagining my new life, when I came across this entry from a few years ago. It's a good reminder of where I've been and where I'm going.
A few days ago I was looking in the mirror and I noticed, as though for the first time, that my nose is bigger than I ever thought, and my face is wider than I remembered. It was as though I were seeing myself clearly for the first time. I wasn't being critical of my face - I could simply see it. It seemed inaccurate to me. I'd always thought I looked more like Kath. We started out exactly the same...how had I become so different than Kath?
In a world of up/down, left/right, good/bad, I had taken on "ugly" to Kathryn's "pretty". I accepted the verdict decided by the peanut gallery. In a competitive world, someone had to be "wrong". I allowed her to feel like "more" by being "less" and deemed it a gift of love, something I could feel good about.
I no longer offer my inferiority as the gift I have to give.
"I dream of a world where there is room enough for both of us to be beautiful."